Natural Hair Journey: Why I Cut My 3B/3C Curly Hair into a TWA

@busybeingsha shot by @stellamor33

@busybeingsha shot by @stellamor33

For the record, I went natural in 2015 after my study abroad in France. I was growing my hair out from the Rihanna-era bob cut, so it made sense to give up heat tools and perms to achieve my hair goals. But unlike others just starting their natural hair journey, I never big chopped, and I was never fully committed to the natural hair lifestyle. I trimmed every so often, but I still used heat to style and further damaged my hair with bleach and hair dyes.

In August of 2017 I completed my first round of Accutane. After 5 months on the drug my hormonal cystic acne was gone, but so was the life in my hair. My curls had loosened, and my hair had thinned out dramatically. I thought that with enough time, my hair would thicken out again and all would be back to normal, but that never happened.

By Fall 2017, I was craving a fresh start all-around. I saved up my coins and made an appointment at the Deva Curl hair salon in SoHo. Armed with inspo pictures and sheer determination, I sat in the chair and asked the stylist to cut all of my hair off. To my surprise, she refused. After a little back and fourth, I left the salon with a trim and my desire to cut my hair was put on the back burner.

Fast-forward to 2018. I found myself protective-styling with wigs more often than not so that I didn’t have to deal with my hair. If I wasn’t wearing a wig, my hair was definitely in a bun. I just didn’t want to deal. I thought about cutting my hair again, but didn’t think my boyfriend would approve. Surprisingly, he was very supportive and that three year itch to cut my hair came flooding back full force. By October 2018, I had a stylist, inspo pictures, and the determination to get it done.

I hadn’t told my friends or family because I didn’t want anyone to talk me out of it. In my opinion, women have an emotional attachment to their hair and they’ll project this attachment onto others. Fortunately for me, I’ve never felt this way about my hair. All of my life, I’ve used it as a tool to express myself. I’ve dyed it every color imaginable, fried it with the crimper and flat iron, shaved off my sides and rocked a mohawk for months. Even permed it for a while to get a ugly little boy to like me (something I wouldn’t recommend).

When people ask me why I cut my hair my standard answer is, “because I wanted to,” and that’s the truth. To me, it’s just hair. It grows freely out of my scalp at all times, and cutting it off was never something that I was afraid of doing. But in all honesty, it was time for a lifestyle change. I was tired of detangling the knots from my hair that my depression didn’t allow me to comb out before it got so bad, I was tired of the fussing and tons of products to try to achieve a particular look, I was tired of faking like I was happy with it.

The experience of cutting my hair was liberating, satisfying, and felt damn good. I knew in that moment that it was the right thing to do and I couldn’t be happier with the results. Since the first cut, I’ve trimmed down a bit lower to maintain a little curly fro. I’m hoping to keep this length until Summer 2019, but as we all know I’m a Gemini so this can change at any given moment.

Have you big chopped, or are you thinking about big chopping? Let’s chat in the comments!

If you enjoyed this post then check out How to Lay Your Baby Hairs & My Favorite Edge Products and How to Overcome Your Fears & Build Self-Confidence.

xo, Sha

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